After only 30 minutes of hacking together the code, mod_parrot now supports an implementation of PHP! Plumhead is a simple PHP interpreter utilizing the Parrot Compiler Toolkit (PCT), and comes bundled with Parrot. Because it uses PCT, it plugs right into mod_parrot with minimal effort. The I/O subsystem is still a complete kludge, as I'm using Parrot's string I/O layer to capture output and feed it back to Apache, but that will be worked out eventually.

Here's the code I was able to run:

Hello
<?php
    echo "World!\n";
?>
I am here.